Patterns in our life

In Bhagvad Gita, an ancient text in India that millions of people use an an ultimate guide to become one with spirit, it is said that the seed of whatever happens is in our consciousness.Because of this we keep attracting the same types of events and people around us. This causes us to do action and then go through the results, on which we have no control.True, we have no control on the results, but I think we have control on identifying the seed of the consciousness by looking at the patterns in our life. For example, in my job, I am always put at some remote site away from my people. The good part is, I get time to meditate and stuff. The bad part if I miss having lunch and tea with my colleagues in the main campus. But the best part is, once I become aware of this pattern I can choose to change it (by telling my boss about changing my role to main campus) or enjoy it (by meditating).So I get more freedom on what I want to do.There are several other patterns in my life other than being left alone. I am very often faced with a situation where I am required to stand for myself. I have to believe in myself and fight the world (not in a violent way though). So the goal of our life is to identify these patterns and become free from them, I guess :-)

Something I have learnt today

All my life I have always thought to become a manager and have always unconsciously thought that managers need to get wok done. And to get the work done they need to have authority and also show that authority. But some events in the last couple of years have taught me that you do not need to display authority.I have learnt today about myself that I am not very good at giving orders to others. I was unnecessarily putting pressure on myself trying to be someone like that.All I can do well, is to ask them can you please do this, or point out to them like, I think it should be this way etc.It is good to realize who I am really am so that I do not get caught up in trying to be what I am not.And now I am on a journey where I am learning stuff about myself even more.

Observing thoughts

Observing thoughts is an interesting game.Today I learnt that thoughts are much better perceived if I sit with my eyes not looking into anything.So for ex. if I am driving or watching television then it is impossible to discern thoughts from what is going on. However, if I am just sitting and looking out of the window or just looking at television (not watching it) then I can see it much better.Same as with hearing etc. I can be engrossed in observing thoughts when I am consciously listening to music etc. Just a few things to be kept in mind.

Thought to create something new

I just learnt a new thing about my behavior. I want to build something that can sustain time and at least be an example. Something like starting a company that grows by leaps and bounds or helping develop some company and be its core members. I know that with increased responsibilities, life also becomes complex but I cannot just avoid this thought. It comes back to me again and again but now I am going to carefully (read with awareness) observe it as it comes up. Just following scriptures...

Fears of the mind

There are so many fears in the mind. In fact, I believe what we actually project in our behavior is something different and is covered under many fears and thoughts. What I am going to do is to start posting out little things that have taken some toll on my mind. I feel at some point indirectly or directly these thoughts have affected the behavior. I am not saying it did affect me in a good or bad way, but I am just going to follow what the great saints have said : To uncover the truth you have to dig deep through the false. It is a long battle. And unless I document what I will see, the fun would be reduced.So in the next few weeks there should be more about the hidden thoughts in this forum.

Being irreplaceable

One thing that constantly is buzzing in my head is about my job.One my previous managers got into my head that you need to make yourself irreplaceable.Now it is another story that he himself got replaced. But his suggestion has really made my mind think, and think more.This small suggestion has allowed me to delve deeply and bring out some interesting facets of human life.The first being...
Isn't everyone worried about being irreplaceable ? Doesn't everyone want to become unique ? That makes the human life different than say animals or plants and so on.Hey, we got movies in our world and to be in a movie you have to be extraordinary :-) Anyway, coming back to the original point, it is one of the basic identities of life to become a unique person ? At times, I feel I have to put in real efforts in order to become unique. For example say in my current job at Cisco. I need to know all the products, configurations etc. to become really successful and differentiate myself. But then I think there is another way, which is to first focus on yourself and find out what exactly ticks you. This cannot be done in a hurry. You need a lot of patience and acceptance to do that. In other words it is exactly opposite of putting in efforts, call it effortlessnes.
Usually I think it is the combination of efforts and effortlessness that will help you to differentiate yourself. Imagine if Einstein had been putting only efforts in the wrong direction without knowing his interests in Physics or Mathematics. Or imagine, if he had only known that he was interested in Mathematics and Physics but had not written any papers or not done any research.So being replaceable involves both...effortlessness or efforts.
Should you land onto this blog, here is your homework-what are you good at and what have you done to grow those skills ?

Why did I start blogging ?

It has been years that I have written anything from my heart.Being in IT and working in Silicon valley most of life is focused on work, work and work. And now the family front has also gotten busy with our cute little daugther, Shreya. I find no time (and absolutely no time) to read books, I mean good quality books.Well, someone may say , you are giving excuses.But hey, I have been used to giving excuse for 32 years (or 31 since I started speaking !) and I am not ashamed of it.So anyway, it feels good to vent out my stuff here, at a place where no one would see it unless they really come across this blog.Ok,let's start...

I can't believe I am already in my 30s. Suddenly, I feel that life is running fast and I have not had to catch up on things I like the most. There is a priority list in front of me (which I will get down to in this blog) that I need to take care of and my own interests have taken a backseat.There is so much going on in my head that the only way to clear up things is either to meditate or write all of it down, which I am doing right now.